It's a tired cliche when people who get stopped with drugs in their possession say the drugs aren't theirs, but it's a tough argument to make when the drugs are found in your buttocks.
But 25-year-old Raymond Stanley Roberts made exactly that argument when he was pulled over in Manatee County Wednesday and officers found a bag of cocaine and a bag of marijuana where the sun don't shine, according to the Bradenton Herald.
Roberts allegedly told police only the bag of marijuana belonged to him, but not the cocaine, when he was pulled over for speeding in his Hyundai.
When officers approached the car, they caught a strong whiff of marijuana, so they decided to search the Hyundai and Roberts.
When the unfortunate officer who had to search Roberts felt a soft object in his buttocks, Roberts offered to retrieve it for him.
"Let me get it," he reportedly said, before pulling out a bag of weed weighing 4.5 grams.
Though Roberts said he had nothing else, the officers continued searching him and found another soft object. When they pulled it out of his shorts, it turned out to be a bag with 27 pieces of rock cocaine weighing 3.5 grams.
“The white stuff is not mine, but the weed is," Roberts told the officers, saying a friend had borrowed the car and had left the cocaine on the passenger seat.
Roberts was charged with drug possession, for both the cocaine and marijuana, and later released from jail on $1,120 bond