Doubters: For Heat to Poop On

Raise your hand if you checked to make sure Tippi Hedren wasn't in the car next to you

By JANIE CAMPBELL
Updated 12:48 PM EDT, Fri, Oct 30, 2009

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A few weeks ago, a mysterious billboard appeared on I-95 southbound, just north of Miami.

"DOUBTERS," it read, in stark white letters on a blank black background. And nothing more -- no company logo, no website, no clues as to whose billboard this was or what it was advertising.

The only embellishment was the placement of a couple "birds" perched on top. 

But gradually, more and more birds appeared. And so did their droppings, increasing with the population daily, until the word DOUBTERS was nearly entirely obscurred by a heaping deposit of bird poop. Before and after pics here.)

And then, just before opening night against the Knicks

"Tickets on sale now. Heat.com"

Brilliant! In other words, the Heat know everyone thinks they'll stink, but they're not going down like that, so you have two choices, citizens of Miami: get on board or get crapped on, figuratively speaking, by Dwyane Wade & Co.

It's enough to make one wish one of these had gone up in Indianapolis weeks ago with the word "Pacers" on it, for the Heat to poop on. They go on the road tonight in Indiana, hoping to win for the first time at Conseco Fieldhouse since 2001, and open a season with back-to-back wins for the first time since 2004.

Doubt them at your peril, or put on a raincoat. Don't say they didn't warn you.

Janie Campbell hopes the Heat marketing department follows this up with a whole line of cakes bearing Dwyane Wade's face stickers. Her work has appeared in irreverent sports sites around the Internet.

First Published: Oct 30, 2009 9:34 AM EDT

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