Henning: Chad Henne Is "a Dictator"

Hopefully the job comes with little knee breaches and a sword

By JANIE CAMPBELL

Updated 1:29 PM EDT, Fri, Oct 2, 2009

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In the wake of Chad Pennington dying on the field last weekend, Chad Henne was naturally on everyone's lips.

Tony Sparano noted that while Henne has led just 6 drives in his year-plus in the NFL, 3 of those resulted in touchdowns.

Analyst Joe Theismann predicted Henne will rival his draftmates Baltimore's Joe Flacco and Atlanta's Matt Ryan: "This is a chance for the Miami Dolphins to become a different kind of football team."

Half of Dolphins message board denizens seem to think a deep Henne-Ted Ginn combo is going to revolutionize the offense and save the season.

LOOK

Remembering Pennington

And offensive coordinator Dan Henning called his new starting QB a "dictator."

Well, that would be awesome, especially if the job comes with Napoleonic knee breaches and tall socks. Oh, it does! Hooray.

"I feel like Henne has progressed," Henning said. "He has great demeanor for the position. He has tools for the position. He has background. He leads differently than Chad [Pennington]. Chad is more like a benevolent despot and Henne is going to be a dictator."

So...Pennington was the soft enlightened one, and Henne is about to order everyone around, lop off heads, and cleanse the AFC East of inferior teams? Well...that'd be nice. Henne may turn out to be the second coming of Dan Marino (hopefully not with a Super Bowl Waterloo) -- there's a reason Bills Parcells drafted him, after all -- but we're just not going to know either way anytime soon.

Even Henning acknowledged that, hilariously, with "I believe strongly that Chad Henne won't be the reason we don't win around here," which is true, because the Dolphins are the reason we don't win around here. Ted Ginn is still a special teamer no matter under whose rule he serves, and even if Henne can throw downfield there's no guarantee anyone will catch it. The usual safety target for young quarterbacks, the tight end, is an Anthony Fasano that hasn't even come close to resembling the 2008 model. The offensive line is 0-1 so far in keeping their leader healthy.

So before Dolphans go all "OMG Dan Marino got his first start against the Bills too IT'S A SIGN YOU GUYZ!!!" let's keep that in mind: Peyton Manning with the Lions would still be just a better Lions, and if Henne was Manning he'd have been starting already.

So patience for Mr. Henne, please. He could be great, now or in time. But whatever happens Sunday and for the rest of the season, it may not mean much either way toward years of iron-fistdom or exile to Elba with all 309 other failed Marino replacements. Certain things will be evident, but even the most statistically accurate quarterback in NFL history couldn't lift the Dolphins higher than this current roster or 30th in passing offense.

For now, Chad Henne can only be as good as what's around him.

Janie Campbell hopes if this doesn't go well we at least get the fun of a Peezy-Crowder coup. Her work has appeared in irreverent sports sites around the Internet.