Welcome to the 804th running of Survivor, this time featuring former Hurricanes and Dolphins coach Jimmy Johnson turning into a crazed hobo before your very eyes in the beachy jungle of Nicaragua, and then wandering through your scenes with a snack of live crab. We were recapping his survival each week, because he’s Jimmy Johnson, but then he got voted off. Can't stop, won't stop, etc...

Last week: NaOnka pledged to push amputee Kelly B. "so hard that damn leg will fly off," because she already pushed her but only just enough to knock the poor girl to the ground. And despite Jimmy T.'s ability to be the most annoying noise ever, the tribe of old people sent Jimmy Johnson packing because Marty said so.

[Hums 'Taps,' holds moment of silence, wipes away single tear]

This week: The specter of loss casts a shadow over the old people, and its hair is perfect. Espada is huddled, soaking and miserable, in a torrential downpour in the middle of the night following tribal council. They all realize it would be a good time to have professional motivator of men Jimmy Johnson on hand, but...you know.

Jimmy T. ill-advises himself and tries to be the new Jimmy J.

"When the going gets tough, know what I mean?" he directs at Dan, who rolls his eyes while everyone's faces silently demand the right to beg for death in peace.

"The leadership Jimmy Johnson supplied -- in everyone else's eyes -- was nuthin'," Jimmy T. tells the camera in nightvision. "He gave a couple'a cheerleading speeches that any chucklehead could do...I wasn't gonna get a lot of playing time with him calling the shots."

Uh, wha? The chucklehead is the guy still using sports metaphors, but he's too busy practicing "leadership" by singing '80s songs to irritable, miserable, suffering, soaking wet people in the middle of the night to notice. Jimmy T. even does his own echo parts in Tom Petty's "American Girl," and it sounds like the death throws of eight yaks and anything but a morale boost. I begin to wish a natural disaster on Nicaragua just so it will end, and that's Jimmy T. leadership for you: they should bottle it, and then put the bottle in a Jennifer Aniston romantic comedy to ensure it is never seen again.

In the morning, Espada is shocked to find their fishing bay washed out by mud from the storm. Jimmy T., who in real life is a professional fisherman, fails at setting out the net because he refuses to head anyone telling him it takes two people.

"I do believe every one of us will miss Jimmy Johnson," says Jane. "I'm gonna miss him because he was as good a fisherman as anybody."

BURN. You're my girl, Jane!

Over at La Flor, Brenda figures out the hidden immunity idol clue NaOnka couldn't after she wrestled it from Kelly B. The two dig it up in a clearing.

"Brenda helped me, but ultimately I figured it out," says NaOnka, as if cameras didn't just film the exact opposite. "I will not let anyone stand in my way. Even a one-legged person can't stand in my way. As you can see," -- here NaOnka makes a swift and classy elbowing motion across her body -- "one shove, and [Kelly B.'s] out of there."

Then, idol hidden in sock, NaOnka follows Alina and Kelly B. on their own idol search just to confront them for funsies. "I don't like you!" she shouts at Kelly B before accusing her of "playing" something she then refuses to explain. "I've never liked you!"

Sweet Kelly B. keeps calm, but is red-eyed and tearful later as she relays the incident to the camera. NaOnka feels anything but sad over her bullying.

"Screw your leg. Screw your leg!" she spits. "Keep it away from the fire."

Ugh. Look, NaOnka's certainly not required to like Kelly B. because she's an amputee, but to hate her because she's an amputee is thoroughly vile and disgusting and possibly the most appalling behavior ever seen from a reality show contestant ever -- and that includes a woman who pooped on a staircase during "Flavor of Love."

At this point, my disgust for NaOnka can only be expressed by Madeline Kahn in the film "Clue."

In the old camp, Marty purposefully riles his most annoying tribe member by nominating Tyrone as the new Jimmy J. It is seconded, but not by Jimmy T.

"I'm just listening in, and it's tough for me...," he complains. "I'm a leader where I come from, and I like to be a leader."

WE KNOW. Yeesh.

Tree Mail comes with blindfolds, and Espada, determined to find a competitive edge deep within their wrinkles, practice walking in them to the sound of Tyrone's even instructions while Jimmy T.'s input is roundly ignored.

Practice makes perfect for everyone but Espada. The younger team cashes in the Medallian of Power when they see the prize at stake -- virtually an entire Sears' worth of tools and tarp and fishing equipment (there's even a grill!) -- and though Bum Knee Danny sits out the blindfolded scavenger hunt, his team fails hard.

Espada's loss is largely due to Jimmy T., who refuses to heed Tyrone's commands and wanders stubbornly and stupidly about the course. GAH!

In the aftermath at La Flor, Chase finds a third immunity idol clue. Brenda, putting herself in an awkward spot, tells Chase that NaOnka has already found the idol. She asks him to keep this info quiet, as NaOnka would feel betrayed.

"You really can't trust anyone in this game," Chase consents. "But sometimes you have to."

Espada is devastated by the loss, and annoyed EVEN MORE by Jimmy T.'s posturing back at camp. Impossible is nothing!

"I'm gonna continue to ask to get a little action," he tells the group. "I think I can contribute. I've coached basketball teams, I continue to coach steamboat crews, I coach children on a regular basis. I think I can be a leader in immunity challenges and I'm going to continue to ask for the chance...

"Doesn't everybody get an equal opportunity?" he asks Tyrone, a black man.

Eyes glaze over. Nations rise and fall. Small children playing youth soccer all across America grasp the concept that not everyone gets equal playing time, all while Jimmy T. goes on and on trying to convince everyone he's a leader.

He might be, of course. But if you have to ask, it's already ruined.

And boy, is Jimmy T. ruined. At Tribal Council, when even Jeff Probst points out to him that his team clearly does not want him assuming a leadership role, Jimmy becomes emotional. While I can appreciate the character he brings to the show, I now want to give Jimmy T. an old school slap across the face. He is actually CRYING because he's not in charge. I can't take it.

Fortunately, no one will have to. Jimmy T. beats out Bum Knee Danny in the race to leave, and Jimmy T. joins Jimmy J. at the loser's hotel, hopefully for some pointers.

Next week: It looks like the producers realize the old people are never going to win, and merge early. NaOnka is shown crying, and we can only hope she's lost her right leg, too. Wheee!