Joey Porter has all but spelled out "I HATE MIAMI" on Tony Sparano's lawn in gasoline and lit it on fire.
After speaking to a radio station in his California hometown last week, he went on Jim Rome's ESPN show yesterday, made it quite clear he wasn't happy in 2009, and asked to be traded.
"I won't accept [a role in which he's rotated] no more, you know what I mean? I accepted it last year because I'm a team guy. I just want to play, have fun and win football games.
"When you're winning, all of this stuff is (swept) away. But after seeing how last year went, asking me to come back and play that role again, I can honestly say I won't come back to do that. I can't be happy about coming back playing that role...
"If you make me a role player, it's saying you really don't want me, right? I mean, I just gave you 17.5 sacks [in 2008]."
Ah, yes, but there were just 9 sacks in 2009, and 2008's double-digits appear to be an aberration: Porter had a combined 12 in the two previous seasons with the Steelers, and it was just the third time in his career he'd notched more than nine.
Even when refusing to come out of the game on third downs when coaches called for it -- a practice which found Porter benched against Tampa Bay -- it was game after game of big talk and few results. He was blanked by a rookie tackle against New England, and average a little over two tackles in the 13 games played.
It's entirely certain the Dolphins won't be pleased with the erstwhile Peezy; this isn't exactly the best way to convince Sparano and Parcells one needs more playing time. Nor is refusing to come off the field. The best way it to be productive, and that's out -- so the question is: will anyone even want him?
Not in a trade. Porter's due $3.8 million next season, which no one's going to pay for a declining, complaining 33-year-old. He's also due a $1 million bonus in March, and gets $200,000 for spring workouts. Is Miami likely to pay him a million in order to get nothing in return next season? Not likely.
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So there you go, Peezy. You asked for it, you'll get it. And by "it," we mean nothing.
Janie Campbell is a Florida native who believes in the pro-set and ballpark hot dogs. Her work has appeared in irreverent sports sites around the internet.
