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Miami Marlins manager Ozzie Guillen has a very particular postgame routine on road trips, one that he detailed to CBS Sports on Thursday. Simply put, he drinks – a lot.
"I go to the hotel bar, get drunk, sleep," Guillen said. "I don't do anything else." Win or lose, Ozzie will booze.
"I get drunk because I'm happy we win or I get drunk because I'm very sad and disturbed because we lose," he added. "Same routine, it never changes. It's been the same routine for 25, 28 years. It doesn't change. I don't like to go out."
How little does he like to go out? He said he has only been to South Beach three times during the 12 years he has lived in South Florida. He added that he's never seen the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco or the World Trade Center in New York, despite numerous road trips to both cities.
Not going out has its advantages, though, according to Guillen. "I never get in trouble, you see that?" he said. "I never leave the hotel. Nobody can call my wife and tell her they see Ozzie in this bar or place."
Indeed, while Guillen has gotten into trouble with his words, he's never been burned by his actions. He said there is a good reason for that. "If I got drunk and someone talked [smack] to me, there'd be a fight," Guillen said. "I'm too little to fight. If I was [Giancarlo] Stanton's size, I would be looking for fights. I can't. I might get killed."
Guillen will surely be criticized for these statements. There is a good chance that while he drinks every night, he probably does not really "get drunk." Making light of drunkenness will rub some people the wrong way.
But even if he does drink every night after road games, at least he does so in a way that keeps him out of trouble (and off the road). Plus, now the Marlins' beat writers will know that if Guillen is in a bad mood some days, it's only because he's hung over.