Spirit of Michael Jackson to Descend Upon Marlins
No word on if Mike Beasley will be on hand to play Tito.
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PASADENA, CA - JANUARY 31: Michael Jackson performs during the Halftime show as the Dallas Cowboys take on the Buffalo Bills in Super Bowl XXVII at Rose Bowl on January 31, 1993 in Pasadena, California. The Cowboys won 52-17. (Photo by George Rose/Getty Images)
The Marlins have been having a pretty good spring so far. They're 9-4 in Grapefruit Leage play, got around to naming the swimming pool and bar level of the new stadium ("La Playa!"), and got two thumbs up from the union for becoming a real boy.
Of course, a good spring doesn't necessarily equal a great regular season. In 2006, the Fish won the Grapefruit League title, for which Marlins owner presented manager Joe Girardi with...a bag of grapefruit. And then fired him a few months later.
So what does indicate a great regular season to come? LASERS. The Marlins announced the "highly anticipated return" of Baker Concrete "Super Saturdays," and get ready for this: one of them, on May 15, will be a Spirit of Michael Jackson Laser Spectacular.
We repeat: SPIRIT OF MICHAEL JACKSON LASER SPECTACULAR.
Oh, sure there's also Nelly, and the New Boyz ("You're a Jerk"), and Willy Chirino and Sergio Vargas and Milly Quezada and Jerry Rivera, but none of them come with lasers or the lingering cloud of child molestation. Or, according to the press release, "one of the top Michael Jackson impersonators and a professionally trained dance troupe... lasers, a large screen video projection, concert lighting and 50,000 watts of amazing sound."
Never mind Josh Johnson's contract or the fact that the Fish haven't traded Hanley Ramirez or the promise of a returning Chris Coghlan. Clearly, because at least 11 extra people will show up to the game for this, this is automatically the greatest decision Fish execs have made in some time.
Here's hoping it gets even better by letting Renyel Pinto play the Smooth Criminal part.
Janie Campbell is a Florida native who believes in the pro-set and ballpark hot dogs. Her work has appeared in irreverent sports sites around the internet.
Posted Tuesday, Mar 16, 2010 - 10:09 AM EST
