Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you sit at home and brush your cat’s fur. Oh, Mr. Bits. No one understands you like Mr. Bits does. LET’S GO!
GREY’S ANATOMY – 9:00PM (ABC) It’s the two-hour season finale of that show your girlfriend used to watch but doesn’t bother with anymore. Show creator Shonda Rhimes has said tonight’s episode will be a “game changer,” which I assume means that LeBron James will be joining the cast and helping the Seattle Grace doctors finally win an NBA championship. Actually, tonight’s episode revolves around a massive crisis (please no ferry crash, please no ferry crash) that could very well leave a handful of major characters dead. Then those characters get to come back as ghosts and have affairs with Izzie. ABC warns that tonight’s episode features graphic violence. NICE! Finally, a little something for the guys. ANTICIPATION: THERE WILL BE BLOOD! AND COLDPLAY!
THE OFFICE – 9:00PM (NBC) It’s also the season finale for this show tonight, and Kathy Bates returns as Jo, the kooky Sabre CEO. Ed Helms’ printer fire plotline takes center stage as Sabre gets in trouble for selling faulty products. I have never had a printer go all fiery on me. But I have touched hot parts of the printer that I should not have touched. And man, does that not feel good. At all. ANTICIPATION: WHISTLEBLOWIN!
PARKS AND RECREATION – 8:30PM (NBC) This is the last episode of Parks until 2011, and that makes me so mad I could punch someone. Parks is being bumped to midseason next year to accommodate “Outsourced,” a new comedy I already resent for taking Parks’ place. ANTICIPATION: BITTERSWEET!
CSI – 9:00PM (CBS) The team tracks the Dr. Jekyll serial killer. Man, real life never has serial killers this cool. TV gets the Dr. Jekyll killer and the miniature killer. And what do we get in real life? John Wayne Gacy. So he wore a clown suit. Where’s the creativity, I ask you? ANTICIPATION: JEKYLL BE HYDIN’!
RIDING THE BUS WITH MY SISTER – 9:00PM (Hallmark Channel) Treat yourself to the 2005 TV movie classic in which Rosie O’Donnell plays a mentally challenged person. It’s like “Simple Jack,” only someone actually made it. ANTICIPATION: CAMPY!