TSA Confiscates Delicious Chocolate-Covered Heroin

The Transportation Security Administration routinely comes across bizarre items that passengers try to sneak through checkpoints. The confiscations at JFK and Newark are right on par with the recent pigeon smuggling antics in Australia, where a man tried to bring in live pigeons by rolling them in newspaper and taping them to his legs, then putting on a pair of tights over all that (didn't work). Instead of pigeons though, passengers are trying to bring in items like seven pounds of professional, candy-factory created, chocolate-covered heroin bars and drug-stuffed dead cats.

In addition to the drugs, “[p]eople are still showing up at the checkpoint with loaded guns, explosives, fireworks,” said TSA spokeswoman Lara Uselding. “We got nun-chucks, Chinese throwing stars [and] swords concealed inside canes this year.” “Someone even once tried to bring a fully gassed-up power chain saw through a checkpoint,” Uselding said. Just since December, the TSA has confiscated $1.2 million worth of diamonds, seven Fabergé bowls (worth $250,000), and over half a million dollars worth of cocaine, hidden ingeniously inside canned vegetables, a Kahlua bottle, and in an attaché case. There’s also been a frozen monkey head, a suitcase filled with live, wriggling cockroaches, and one deceased gentleman whose relatives tried to roll him through customs in a wheelchair to avoid paying the fee for transporting a corpse.

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