A Judge And His Books Take Cover

David Souter leaves ancestral home for bigger, fancier home

The newly retired Supreme Court Justice David Souter was known for two things when he still lived in the public eye: making George H.W. Bush very sad that he didn't appoint a more reliably conservative justice to the Supreme Court, and dwelling in a seedy shack out in the New Hampshire wilderness that photojournalists loved to document from creepy angles.

In other words, Souter was about the most boring justice alive this side of Stephen Breyer.

Everybody was quite delighted when he decided to quit the Supreme Court at the relatively youthful age of 69, clear out of DC (which he never much liked anyway) and go back to his boring life in the woods. His all-but-certain replacement, a fiery Puerto Rican with a bum ankle, is sure to produce more entertaining headlines as she rewrites the Constitution from the bench.

Which leaves dull old Souter to shuffle off to his ancestral woodshed, thereafter to read his books in peace. But! Now comes word of a relatively exciting chapter in the life of the persnickety New Hampshirite:

Souter is leaving his modest colonial-era farmhouse, which has been in his family for generations, and moving into a 3,500-square-foot Cape Cod-style home.

He purchased his new home last week for $510,000, according to county records, from New England College President Michele Perkins and her husband, James. Built in 1987, the three-bedroom home is on about two acres in the upscale neighborhood called Hopkins Green, according to Avitar's online assessment site.

So fancy! But why does he need this new house, which while spacious is located in close proximity to other people (whom he loathes)?

[A neighbor] said Souter told him one reason he decided to move was because the farmhouse wasn't structurally sound enough to hold his thousands of books.

So instead of doing the sensible thing and just renting out a storage unit or, heaven forbid, getting rid of some of "his thousands of books," the professional nerd David Souter has instead decided just to get a bigger house, for the purposes of book storage.

This kind of profligacy sets a very bad example for our nation's youth, so thank goodness nobody is paying attention to David Souter anymore.

Corporate archivist Sara K. Smith writes for NBC and Wonkette.

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