There are so many entertaining behind-the-scenes goings-on with those wacky Marlins.

Reliever Burk Badenhop aspires to be a Hollywood screenwriter. Hanley Ramirez dresses for Dave & Buster's like he's going to romance an arcade game. Nate Robinson co-owns the minor league team made famous by its (former) manager's YouTube-'sploding, arm pit-smelling tirade last year.

And John Baker once played William Wallace in an Albequerque Isotopes' remake of Braveheart (oh, you'll find it worth watching), though that isn't all: he also enjoyed Greek philosopher Plato's book Republic over the weekend in Denver, which prompted the following hilarious conversation reported by Clark Spencer:

"It reminds me of college, when people are like hammered and arguing...It's amazing that this is written in the fourth century B.C., because it just sounds normal, like normal arguments. Is it better to be selfish and look out for yourself, and make sure all your stuff is taken care of? Or is it better to do right by your fellow human beings? And that's what the first book is about.

"Plato, via Socrates, argues that it's better to be just than unjust. And the other guy argues that it doesn't matter. Unjust is stronger than the just, that just people are weaker."

At this point in the conversation, Wes Helms walks past, gives Baker the look, and wants to know "what the heck" Baker is talking about.

Helms: "I don't read books."

Baker: "I'm reading Plato."

Helms (assuming Baker meant "Play Doh"): "I played with that when I was a kid." 

Oh, Uncle Wes. In the face of the Helm's moldable clay-dense quip, Baker mustered a dignified "I personally think you would find his arguments interesting" and that was that. Guess he'll have to find his Aristotle somewhere other than third base.