Strap in, Miami, for the most ridiculous day of your NBA fandom: ESPN says LeBron James will join Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh in Miami, "barring a late change of heart."
In other words, he's coming here, unless he decides to go elsewhere or stay in Cleveland. Which equates to no information at all, except that 1) LeBron James is going to sign with an NBA team, you guys! 2) ESPN is now trying to scoop (or promote by fake scooping) its own hour-long show, and 3) no one knows anything.
Good thing free agency happens only once every 3,000 years, right?
(That's a factual timeline, barring a late change of heart.)
But what about those rumors? They began in earnest with Newsday, first on the scene with a pretty strong statement: "Multiple sources are telling Newsday that LeBron James has decided to join Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh in Miami. The new Big Three is here."
Appropriately enough for this circus, the accompanying article was tucked behind a pay wall.
Then came the Worldwide Leader, galloping in on a leprachaun and pixie dust, to tell us "sources with knowledge of the situation" were confirming LeBron to Miami before dropping the whole "change of heart" disclaimer.
Be skeptical about this rumored "new Big Three," for multiple reasons.
First, this sounds very much like LeBron's people floating rumors to keep suspense going for tonight's Big Live Announcement. This is, after all, the same camp that Wade and Bosh believe deliberately leaked their own decisions to LeBron's TV partner just so the King could have his own day to himself.
Secondly, half of last night's other rumors fit the story perfectly and were completely debunked. There was no private plane headed to Miami to meet with Pat Riley; LeBron played softball with friends in Ohio. There was no steak dinner with Wade in Miami; Flash had a root canal. What's left: a general, and perhaps false, impression that Lebron's still interested.
Third, and maybe we have too much faith in humanity for once, but would even LeBron James hold a one-hour special in which he bends the entire state of Ohio over a barrel in the most notorious and public sports spurning of all time? If he leaves the Cavs in a one-hour special, he might as well pick a tiny white Cleveland child out of the audience and punch her straight in the face.
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But maybe LBJ is just that much of an a-hole. Some people think so. And if he does go on live television to instantly secure himself as the biggest jerk of all time, well, then he'll be our jerk -- Miami's jerk -- and none of this ever happened.
