Bad Florida Speller Sues WikiLeaks, Assange for $150 Million

Key Wester says the U.S. will run out of money thanks to Wikileak's publication of confidential diplomatic cables

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    NEWSLETTERS

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    Wikileaks founder Julian Assange has his hands full with the legal system already, but one South Florida resident isn't afraid to pile on.

    David Pitchford, who claims to be a Miami resident but lists an address in a Key West trailer park, filed a $150 million lawsuit against both Wikileaks and Assange for the intentional infliction of emotional distress by the release of documents that "indangered (sic) the PLAINTIFF as well as every person of the United States; and the entire planet."

    In turn, every person of the United States and the entire planet is now mildly endangered by Pitchford's spelling. In the four-page complaint he filed in U.S. District Court for the Southern District of Florida in Miami, Pitchford claims he has "suffered serious personan (sic) injury" including a "worsening" of "PLAINTIFFS hyper tention (sic)," "depression," and "Stress," and that he has been living in "constant fear of being stricken by another heart attack and or stroke as a result of the foregoing" and "fear of being on the brink of Nucliar (sic) WAR."

    Pitchford further explains in the suit that he fears the U.S. will run out of money as a result of the diplomatic fallout from confidential cables leaked through the Australian hacktivist's organization, thereby diminishing the Medicaid benefits on which he depends. 

    He is asking $100 million "dollors" in compensatory damages, $50 million in punitive damages, and that Wikileaks and Assange be held accountable for the costs of his legal battle.

    Call it a hunch, but here's guessing the case doesn't make it it that far.