The incredible hoopla over Tim Tebow this week didn't start with the question of whether or not the Almighty had been de-jorted, though that was as juicy a morsel as one could ask for (or not want to know, at all).
Rather, it began with the bombshell on July 16 that one of the SEC coaches had not voted for Tebow in the Pre-Season All-SEC poll.
Who dared slight the Tebow Child?! a bored America asked, both recoiling in horror and instantly burning holes into Tennessee's Lane Kiffin as the Boy Wonder himself shrugged it off and the Florida faithful tittered "Oooh, now you've made him angry!"
And one by one, when Tebow wasn't fielding questions about his bathing suit area, each coach in the SEC began their time at the conference's Media Days with denial, praise, genuflection, and adoration. ("I’m not crazy," said Arkansas' Bobby Petrino said. "Yeah, I voted for him.")
In fact, it sounded pretty much like this:
Finally, there was but one man standing -- and with his record of wacky voting and curmudgeonly outspokenness, was anyone surprised? Alas, Steve Spurrier ended the delicious drama with a whimper when he said his vote for Jevan Snead over Tebow was an accident, and apologized:
Sports
I didn’t fill the sheet out...Our director of operations brought it in to me, I looked at it quickly, I said that’s fine and signed off on it. I called and said certainly we had Tim Tebow, he said 'Actually, Coach, we had Jevan Snead.' I said why? Well we already had 10 Gators. maybe got another guy. It’s my fault, I take full responsibility. We should not have messed that up. I apologize to Tim Tebow. I’m embarrassed about it. I feel bad about it. I called (SEC official) Charlie Bloom, 'Can I change my selection?' He said yes, I was able to put Tim Tebow in today so it’s unanimous. We made a mistake there, and I made a mistake. Tim Tebow is not only the best quarterback in this league, I think he’s the best football player in the country.
Booo-ring! If there's one guy we thought we could count on to keep it interesting while Florida rolls to another title, it was Spurrier. After all, he'd already confronted Kiffin and is fending off rumors he's retiring. Why not go out big and vote that way on purpose?
For one shining moment, it seemed someone else was as sick of Tim Tebow as we are, and just wanted to have a litte fun. But at least the confession meant the Old Ball Coach fielded 485 ensuing questions about filling out his ballot, and not whether or not he's had sex.
[Shudder]
Janie Campbell tossed a visor when the apology started. Her work has appeared in irreverent sports sites around the Internet.
