Dumbing It Down: Miami Among the Most Stupidest Cities

Miami ranks as the 9th dumbest city

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    Miamians have turned being stupid into an art form. And what a beautiful work of art it is.

    The Miami metropolitan area is the 47th dumbest city out of 55 major U.S. areas, according to the Daily Beast's annual "Smartest Cities" survey.

    Miamians received an IQ score of 61.65, which is slightly above the intelligence of a kindergartner but slightly below the smarts of a lab chimpanzee. But at least we are hotter than the chimp.

    Boston was declared the smartest city in America, but what else is there to do in Boston besides read? On the other end of the spectrum is Las Vegas. Apparently constant blinking lights and loud sounds kill brain cells at an alarming rate.

    The Daily Beast determined their smart matrix by looking at things like the number of libraries available, investment to intellectual culture and other factors too complicated for the Miamian mind to comprehend.

    It also looked at the number of bachelor's and graduate degrees in the area, but everyone knows the only degrees that count in South Florida are the ones on that thing that keeps the temperature.

    What's that thing called again?

    Oh yes, a therm-o-meter.

    And it also appears we are getting dumber by the year. Last year, Miami ranked 39th, which is only mildly mediocre.

    An interesting tidbit that we don't quite know what to make of is that Miamians have bought 2,642,000 adult non-fiction books this year.

    Is Dr. Seuss non-fiction?