BREAKING
NEWS
MIami Fire Rescue
Urban myth our fat fannies!
Miami-Dade Fire Rescue pulled a 7-foot, 150-pound alligator from a storm drain in a residential neighborhood Friday afternoon, just before it could burst from underneath the street and take its revenge on the person who flushed it down the toilet.
Not really.
No one knows how the reptile got stuck in the sewer, but our guess is it was flushed as a baby and then grew up in the sewers while eating rats, beef patties and the occasional chihuahua.
Rescue officials think it just wandered from a nearby canal near the neighborhood, but out theory is more fun and spookier. The gator had been stuck in the drain for two days and hissed until someone finally decided to free it.
So much for growing to the monstrous sizes of folklore. A trapper released it into the Everglades, where it will likely be eaten by a Burmese python.